Another post. Well this is because it happened after I posted the other post.
We actually returned home from our trip to Mexico early. We were supposed to return on the 18th, this Friday, but instead we returned the 15th, today. Well of course, my brother and I had to call our dad and tell him that we made it home safely. Now, here is what i was afraid of:
My dad knows that we are back at home on a Tuesday. We are home before his normal days that he would have us (Wednesday and Thursday). Why does this make me afraid? Because my dad is going to ask me and my brother if we are coming over on Wednesday and Thursday when originally we were not going to be with him (obviously because we would not have been home).
I hate that so much. I hate having to choose whether or not to go to one house or stay at the other. I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings or upset anyone by doing so. I usually do have a preference of where I'd like to stay, and it normally isn't the same house ever time, but I still hate having to choose. Like today when my dad was asking me this question, he has to tack on the comment that will make me feel guilty if I choose to stay at my mom's. He says "I would think you would because it's my normal day, but it's up to you."
Well, I wanted to stay at my mom's. I was tired after the long car ride, I just wanted to unpack and relax and recuperate from the long journey without having to worry about having to gather up my stuff to go over to my dad's for two days just to return back to my mom's. To me, it wasn't worth the hassle.
My brother was of the same opinion. Now, we have to inform our dad of our decision. Shouldn't a red flag go up alarming you that something isn't right when your kids fight over who has to tell one of their parents that they would rather stay with their other parent? This is what happened with me and my brother, and my mom was standing right there watching us and she thought it was funny! How is that funny? I see no humor in making your kids have to choose between one parent and the other.
How do you choose? If you're like me and you love both of your parents and you don't want to hurt their feelings, how do you choose? It's hard, extremely hard. If I had to choose between my parents to live with one full time, I could never do it.
As a teenager, I know I will have to make many decisions. Some will be small, some will be big, life-changing decisions. Which classes I plan on taking next year?, what activities do I want to participate in ?, what am I going to wear to Homecoming? those decisions are fairly simple. More critical decisions can include when I'm offered a cigarette, what choice will I make? When I'm offered drugs, what choice will I make? Is abstinence important to me? All of these decisions are life-altering. The outcome could be good the outcome could be bad, depending on the decision that is made. These are just a few, there are many many more. So, on top of all that, should we have to choose between our parents? No, we shouldn't have to.
Well, that's all I have for now,
Jay~Jay
About Me
- Just_Like_Ping_Pong
- I'm Jay~Jay. I'm pretty mcuh not normal becuase normal is boring. My friends are super amazing and own all. You losers know who you are :D. Eccentricity defines me. And it's a really cool word. I love to write. It's an addiction. It's my high. Hell of a lot better than drugs. Says a person who has never tried drugs. :D It's probably better than se-well I wouldn't actually know. I might let you know when I know. *wink**wink*
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1 comment:
I'm multi-posting. Commenting for almost all your posts so far, it will be long...I warn you
Hey Jay-
I can understand what you're going through. My parents aren't necessarily divorced, you see, for they were never married. But when my dad left, I didn't really know him at my young age, but of what I do remember of him, is that he smelled like tar. (Positive, always) When he left, my family was torn, and we thought that he was just fed up with such a large family and went to start over.
Your dad still loves you, and so does your mom, they may not express it in the same ways, but they do; and thats one of the things you have to remember. Your mom is kinda like mine, she cares, but shes not always positive. Sometimes what she says can hurt, and she doesn't neccessarily realize that she did hurt you. I would advise you talked to her, because when I was younger, my mom blamed everything on me (granted, maybe it was because I looked most like my father..) but I was fed up with defending myself and sat down and talked with her; told her what was on my mind. She changed since then, and in a way we're closer.
Ok, we have a lot in common. My step-dad (whose pretty much my dad) smokes. And he's trying desperately to stop. and so far, he's been on about two weeks without one cigar/cigarette. What you need to do is just encourage him to stop, tell him what cigarettes do, don't do it yourself.
As for the life decisions, we're faced with decisions about everyday. When we get up, what we wear, what we do, its all a decision. Some are big, some are bad. But...with each decision comes experience. With every experience we have, we get an advantage over others who haven't made that kind of decision. Some hurt you, some may hurt others, some may make others happy too. Overall, its what makes you happy.
I have a lot of experience I guess, but thats because I live with the female-gender, and my step-father is always gone. So, oh well.
Tell your father that you feel like staying home, that you just want to relax, unpack, chill. But say it with meaning, like the true reason is this-->you want to stay at your mother's.
Everything will work out in the end, and hey, you already have more experience than others with the divorce; hence you're stronger than others mentally.
Hang in there, and I think your blog is quite amazing =)
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